I guess it’s a common thing. I knew hubby was looking at porn sometimes because he told me so. I asked to see what he looked at, and at first he did not want to show me but eventually I convinced him. It was all female dominant male submissive stuff. (what I call fdms now because I am lazy about typing) I was surprised at how much it turned me on, and I asked him if he wanted me to do those things to him. I had never seen him blush the way he did as he said yes to that.
So I looked online at a lot of blogs and things to learn more about this. I had always liked bdsm, and knew i was sort of switchy, but i had never tried taking on the dominant role before and I wanted to learn more about it
Most of what I found seemed irellevant because it was unrelated to anything i wanted. Now that we have been doing this a while I find more of it useful than I did at first. I still don’t want to whip him bloody or cbt him into impotence but a lot of the things about control that I learned I learned from blogs of dommes doing those things. Control is control and the exact path that you take to it can be very different for different people, but its really what you do with it that is so different from domme to domme. I do not want to make him eat cum but the manipulation, persuasion and conditioning that other women have used to get their bitches to do that are really the same as what i did to get hubby to take toys up his ass and wear a collar around the house in front of our friends. But some of it took a long time. At first I just had him kneel and lick me out and call me Mistress and wash the dishes. I added things one by one by one.